This problem is what is known as the “tyranny of the lowest common denominator.” That is, the person who cares the least has the most control- it could be a person of either sex. It doesn’t matter. It could be any topic, too, not just housework.

The solution here is to hire it out. Then the common denominator is money, which is a lot easier to quantify and discuss than whatever power issues are going on. If one works their tail off 9-5 and doesn’t want to clean the bathroom, they shouldn’t. Hire someone who will. It’s that easy. If one’s spouse doesn’t like that, then they’ll do their own little mental calculations, figure out what their time is worth and do it themselves. Or pay the housekeeper. Really, it’s not that hard to do.

We don’t do anything for ourselves around here save for laundry- except the kids because they need to learn how to do things for themselves. (Also, their time isn’t worth anything, but I don’t tell them that). I always tell them the point of having money is not to buy stuff, it’s to buy time.

Thanks, though!

Just don’t tell him I said that.

Cammy – be gentle. He’s a good guy.

I bet you’re counting your blessings, huh?

And you’re right, Craig — I’m sure that the article was hailed by many, but if it had been written from the other point of view – as you did in your subtle “correction” — the author would have been pilloried and held up as a misogynistic troglodyte.

I really hated the author’s view that it was just fine to use withholding sex as a weapon. What a BITCH! Try talking to your husband respectfully instead of just complaining. Some of us are worthless, but some of us were worth marrying.